All hail the (young) BOSS LADY from waaaay back in the 90's!

(Fishnets and big boots are still a thing now, too!)

Right then, let’s get this glitterball rolling - for those of you who don’t know me, I’m Lara Gothique, founder of The Velvet Burlesque, international choreographer, performer, teacher, producer, and self-confessed Swamp-Witch. I’ve been dancing and performing since I was knee-high to a grasshopper (yes, really), and I’ve never looked back - just hot-fixed more rhinestones on, gotten louder, stronger, and more confident about it.

Back in 1991, as the end of my teenage education years loomed, I knew that I didn't want to be forced into a desk job, or, to quote a family friend - 'something more suitable for a young lady'. I had always had this wild idea to take the risk and turn my lifelong love for dance, music, theatre, and all things flamboyant into a full-blown business. My (very prudish) Sixth-Form Headmaster was horrified that I had plans to be an exotic dancer and showgirl, alongside teaching dance and fitness - he sat me down in his office, told me loudly and repeatedly to get a “proper job”, and snorted that my 'little, ill-advised venture' wouldn’t last the year anyhow, and that my reputation as an already serious and established dancer would be in tatters.

WELL ...

On the 1st of September 1991 - I hit the ground running!

Here we are – nearly three and a half decades later – I'm still dancing, performing and teaching. I made a bloody good career out of my dreams, and The Velvet Burlesque is one of the biggest, boldest, and longest-running burlesque and cabaret businesses in the UK.

I’ve travelled across the world and dazzled countless audiences, taught in schools and higher education premises, prisons, and government offices, produced shows and events for royalty, and made speeches in various imposing conference halls.

I've danced (and taken my clothes off!) in clubs, bars, theatres, music halls, tents in deserts, articulated trucks, marquees, hotels, strip clubs, nightclubs, private venues, bingo halls, barns, ballrooms, basements, back gardens, boudoirs, breweries, bathhouses, boats, boxing rings, bus shelters (seriously!), cabaret dens, catwalks, castles, crypts, circus rings, conference centres, converted warehouses, community halls, discos, dining rooms, dodgy hotel rooms, empty swimming pools, festivals, film sets, function rooms, ferries, garages, gentlemen’s clubs, grand staircases, gyms, haunted pubs, hotel lobbies, libraries, live music venues, lounges, museums, open fields, opera houses, old cinemas, penthouses, palaces, rehearsal studios, rooftops, roller rinks, shopping centres, speakeasies, stately homes, tattoo parlours, warehouses, wedding venues, wrestling rings, yachts, and once - a moving float in a parade (don’t ask about the wind and the rain that day!).

I've also helped many thousands of glorious humans to shimmy, slut-drop, grapevine, kickbox, bicep curl, and plank their way to confidence, connection, fitness, shows, stages, and a damn good time!

✨  DANCE IS MY MAGIC:

Choreography and performance have always been my happy place - it’s how I tell stories, how I communicate, and quite frankly, how I keep my sanity. I created The Velvet Burlesque to share that magic with others.

Through my classes and workshops, I help people celebrate the skin they’re in, rediscover their self-confidence, self-worth, and embrace all the messy, marvellous bits of themselves.

Whether you're a total beginner or someone with a back catalogue of jazz hands, you’re welcome. Just bring your sparkle (real or metaphorical), or if you've lost it - I'll help you find it again!

✨ FITNESS WITH FLAIR (AND ZERO JUDGEMENT):

I’ve also been a fully qualified fitness teacher and personal trainer since 1991, so yes, I’ve been helping people squat, crunch, press, and swear through workouts since shoulder pads were still a thing.

I don’t just care about how you move, I care about why you move, and how you feel while doing it.

With well over 30 years of training, study, and hands-on client experience, my specialities are: 

• Post-op rehabilitation (including but not limited to: heart surgery, back surgery, hernia, hip/knee replacements, mastectomy, bone injury, road accidents, etc.)
• Pre & post-natal fitness (including Symphysis Pubis Dysfunction [SPD], post-C-section, etc.)
• Dealing with chronic conditions & long-term illness/injury
• Sports injuries
• General day-to-day injury/illness rehabilitation (eg: falls, sprains, back pain, sciatica, arthritis, general wear & tear, etc.)
• Dealing with peri-menopausal/menopausal issues and changes
• Additional in-depth personalised programmes and support is also available

I regularly work with referrals from GPs, consultants, physiotherapists, chiropractors, and midwives, offering safe, supportive, and inclusive sessions for a wide range of needs.

I work with all ages, genders, shapes, sizes, and ability levels - from full-on fitness fiends to those recovering from injury, illness, surgery, or those just starting their movement journey.

Every programme I offer is personalised, inclusive, and above all, kind to your body.

(Unless you count those bloody awful Bulgarian Split Squats!)

✨ EVERYONE IS WELCOME - ALWAYS:

(Unless you're a "Mean Girl" ... definitely no Mean Girls allowed!)

My classes and workshops are open to everyone (aged 18+ for dance) - all genders, ethnicities, body types, backgrounds, and energy levels. The Velvet Burlesque isn’t just about movement - it’s about community, support, laughter, and finding your tribe.

And yes, we are very good at welcoming nervous newbies. You’ll come in shy, and leave with a strut.

 ✨ MEET "HELLS BELLE" - MY AMAZONIAN ALTER EGO!

On stage, I become "Hells Belle" – a formidable Showgirl Glamazon with a reputation for commanding presence, killer costumes, and incredibly fast nipple-tassels! Think old-school glamour meets gothic ferocity, and then add a touch of danger, because honestly, this bitch bites if you pull her tail.

The name? That’s a nod to one of my favourite bands of all time - the mighty AC/DC.

Their track "Hells Bells" absolutely thunders with drama, power, and attitude, so naturally, it became the inspiration for my onstage persona.
Loud, proud, and impossible to ignore? Sounds about right.

I’ve performed internationally, and all over the UK, bringing all kinds of shows and events to life - from exotic clubs, classic burlesque stages, gogo podiums, to dark fantasy, horror, fetish, historical themed events and beyond. I’ve even thrown in a bit of stunt horse-riding and motorbike madness over the years (because apparently I just don’t know how to sit still).

If you’ve got a crazy idea, or want something bespoke for your event, just ask! I’m always up for creating something new and unforgettable.

Some lovely (and slightly cheeky) testimonials for "Hells Belle":

• “An hourglass figure, with the sand in all the right places.” – Mister Meredith
• “A Victorian Gothic masterpiece … fitting into the surroundings perfectly.” – 21stCenturyBurlesque.com
• “The fastest tassels in the North!” – Feline Productions
• “Her onstage persona is large, vibrant, and confident... there ain’t nothing like a pro.” – Allie J Carr

I’m not here to be subtle. I’m here to make you feel something, whether it’s awe, joy, or the sudden urge to go home and put on heavy make-up, high heels, and fishnets in my honour.

 ✨ BEHIND THE SCENES: WELLIES, DOGS, CATS, & PERFECT SWAMP-WITCHERY:

When the spotlight dims and the dancing shoes come off, I turn into a full-blown, welly-wearing hermit. I live on a farm in a gloriously rural area of North Sheffield with my husband, The Viking, a landscape gardener.

I genuinely love nothing more than muddy boots, sunny days, and wandering around the woodland and moors with my majestic Great Danes, whispering choreography to the trees while the wind decides if my fringe is coming along for the ride too.

I’m also frequently surrounded by cats - some are spoiled house cats, and some are feral rescues that I've trapped, neutered and released again here. I swear they’re running some sort of feline underground network - the word is clearly out about the 24/7 cat food buffet - new buggers keep turning up! I suspect there’s a feline WhatsApp group.

(And yes, I'll save the story about the trapped feral cat who bit through my boob for another time ...!)

Add to that our ever-rotating cast of poultry, the occasional herd of goats, and a past filled with horses and reptiles - it’s basically a glittery Noah’s Ark, but with slightly more eyeliner.

I’m a total nature-lover at heart. Give me the sound of birds and other wildlife over traffic any day. That’s where I find my peace, and where I remind myself that the woman who makes the magic also needs time to recharge.

That said, while I may be a rural hermit in my downtime, make no mistake - I rarely sit still! As my close friends will tell you, I always have at least 37 swirling brain tabs open, usually involving several new choreography pieces, evolving show concepts, a huge admin to-do list (because self-employment/owning a business = no bloody end to the admin!), and random business ideas I decide to start Google-ing and planning at 4am when the insomnia inspiration hits. (And of course, a last-minute online panic shop for a crucial prop replacement needed for this weekend’s event, because, naturally, the original one fell apart dramatically at the end of the last show's pack-down. Glitter explosion included.)

I started this business in an era of VHS tapes, paper flyers/posters, and word-of-mouth. Now I’m juggling SEO algorithms, livestreams, and sodding Instagram Reels. If the stage teaches you anything, it’s that you have to adapt - constantly. Trends shift, tech evolves, clients and audience habits change, and while you don’t need to sell your soul to every new craze, you do need to keep moving whenever the spotlight does.

What a lot of people don’t see is that I’ve built this life and business through more than just sequins and show-face. I live with various frustrating and painful chronic health conditions, and I’ve faced some terrible personal losses, including six devastating miscarriages, survived domestic violence, rape, and death threats. Experiences that absolutely knocked me off my feet - shook me - shaped me, but also made me fiercer, more focused, and even more determined to carve out joy, connection, and meaning wherever I can.

So when I say, “Trust The Process!” I mean it.
Because I’ve danced through some very (very) dark days, and thankfully found some light on the other side.

This chaotic showbiz life vs. the grounded life - part Glamazon - part Swamp-Witch - keeps me real. It’s where the costumes get packed away, the lashes come off, and I reconnect with the messy, muddy, magical version of myself.

After nearly 35 years of business in this wild world of feathers and footlights, I’ve met and worked with some incredible people, been part of some spectacular events and opportunities, overcome so many challenges for myself and my business, and proved that yes - you can make a career out of shaking your bits, and yelling instructions at people!

So that’s me - Boss Lady - Lara Gothique - Hells Belle - Swamp-Witch - (Slightly Feral) Founder of The Velvet Burlesque. Proud producer, consummate performer, passionate teacher, trustworthy mentor, professional idiot, and the kind of woman you can ask to milk a goat if you need her to (honestly!).

Often imitated - never surpassed.

Come along sometime.

Click the links.

We’ll make some magic together!

L.x.

💋 Boss Lady - Lara Gothique

Founder, Curator, Choreographer, Performer, Swamp-Witch, and Slightly Feral Producer of The Velvet Burlesque™

© Lara Gothique - Velvet Burlesque™
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